Operation Barry Bonds Balls Strategy Diagram

Barry Bonds' Balls

Tuesday, July 31, 2007. Dodger Stadium, Section 110, Row Y, seats 5-8. History will be made.

Operation Barry Balls Checklist:
mace
decoy balls
Greek fisherman's net
cop mustache and cop shades
binocs
duel foghorn
cutty sark flask w/maker's mark inside
stinkbombs
megaphone
baseball gloves



Dear Barry Bonds,
If you read this, please, for the love of God, for the love of all that is holy, for the love of your big ass meat head, pummel one over to section 110, Row Y, seats 5-8, and then pay us a million dollars to give it back.

Thank you,
Skeet, Sara Kaye, J.G. & Bethany

Moons over My Bloggy...

Clever title, no? Skeet thought it up, I laughed. We're bored, we being Skeet and I, I being J.G.. Tonight we conceived "BosomBloggies", and this is pretty much the first time in 17 years the two of us have ever collaborated on anything, so take that as something worth your while.

First time I've ever seen J.G. kinda sorta drunk. Yeah right now, on a Tuesday night. I think he's been drinking for several months now but honestly he doesn't really drink. He sips and coddles a beer for about an hour til its got about 1/4 empty and warm. Then he quits and says he's drunk as he stumbles into the Whambulance. But tonight man that motherfuckers drank a whole beer and a half. I'm quite impressed. Oops, I forgot he's spilled some of his beer chasing an Africanized cricket around the living room.

I'm blind...no wait, I mean drunk. The bible says that dinasaurs were created by God several thousand years ago, but I don't believe that. I think, therefore I blog. My mind is having a hard time focusing right now, it's sort of "waddling around", and I like it. Did I mention God created dinasaurs, cause he did. "I am the light, I am the way" ~Jesus Christ...Jesus Christ.

Did i mention jg is 33 years old.

And?

....and the beers are midget cans, 11.2oz. If I could get wasted that easily, my wallet would be much fatter these days.